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51% Parent – 49% Friend

November 29, 2010

I am so excited about this blog. Sandra (my wife) has agreed to become a  bigger part of Eyes of the Heart Ministries as we begin the process of ministering to couples, women and men. She loves helping people become better parents to their children, and is the best boy mom I have ever known. I hope you enjoy her blog!

51% Parent – 49% Friend

 It is funny how God works, I was very lucky several years ago to obtain a job at a high school as an administrative secretary.  You may be thinking what a funny statement, you call that luck, but you see I really enjoy children. I have two boys of my own and they are awesome kids. This job allowed me the opportunity to help a lot of children. I had several kids that would come to me about their home lives, their friends, school, and their excitement about the up coming dance.  They knew they were welcome in my office any time they needed someone to talk too. Most of them just needed to know that someone actually cared about them. There was a sad realization for me to know that these kids could not talk to their parents, or worse yet, did not feel comfortable talking to their parents. 

My fifteen year old came in at break, lunch and after school to hug me and see how my day was going every day, so it was tough for me to realize these kids were not getting the love and understanding they were craving. You see sometimes parents feel that the only reason they have children is to lay down the  rules, force them to submit to each and every one they establish, and then become the individual they want them to be.  Life is not, I repeat not about rules, yes there have to be guidelines, but so many times we as parents become more like High Priests; we get so caught up in the rules we forget to check out the facts. I hate to tell you but God did not give you your children to rule over and mold them into what you want them to be. This is their life, and God has plans for them and knows what their future holds. We as parents do not. God has shared this blessing with us to love and cherish as he does us. We need to spend more time teaching our children how to live life to the fullest.

Do you still know how to have fun? Maybe it is time for you to let your child teach you a thing or two about having fun. Grab a basketball, and hit the courts with them for the afternoon, go for a hike, or play in the creek catching crawdads. Forget you are their parent for a few minutes, and just be your child’s friend. Get wet, laugh and have fun with them, play a little soccer, or whatever will give you some time to bond with your child. Remember, during this time there are no rules, and it is just about having fun. You will be amazed at how much this will help you bond with them, and how rewarding your life will become. If you continue this time of engagement throughout your child’s life, when the tough times come your children will come to you for understanding and guidance instead of culture or their friends. Act like a CHILD sometimes; enjoy your life.

A special thanks to Jack Harrington for the great photo. He is a great photographer.

 Matthew 18:1-3

At that time the disciples came to Jesus, asking, “Who is the greatest in the Kingdom of heaven?” So Jesus called a child, had him stand in front of them, and said, “I assure you that unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the Kingdom of heaven.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. Becky permalink
    December 6, 2010 4:53 am

    Love your heart. What a great thought. You are a special mom.

    • December 7, 2010 4:50 pm

      She is special isn’t she Becky!


  2. December 12, 2010 5:29 am

    Kirk and I saw first hand the kind of fun loving mother you are to your boys. You are an inspiration! Thanks for sharing.

    • December 15, 2010 4:31 pm

      Thanks Kathy! Love you!

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