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Marriage Trumps Religion

September 15, 2010

I think God honors marriage more than He does religion. That statement came to me after a hard day of counseling yesterday. I didn’t think it up, for some reason it just showed up inside my head. It wasn’t like it even came from my own thoughts; it felt more like a message that I needed to hear from God.

So the question on the table is “How much do you honor your marriage?”

Now before you dismiss my thoughts, remember this, Jesus didn’t like overly religious people either. His worst fights were with the religious of his day, because their religious practices had replaced a relationship with God. What Jesus likes is relationship, and the key to relationship is being known. I would say that the biggest problem inside of marriages today is the lack of intimacy and trust to ask for what you need most from your spouse. See most people are not known even in their closest relationship. This is so sad for me; I see it on a daily basis, the fear of being vulnerable is everywhere.

Are you vulnerable in your marriage? To need affirmation from your spouse does that sound scary?

According to the latest statistics (Barna Research) Christians are getting divorced at an equal rate to those who consider themselves non-Christian. What does this tell the world about our real values? Do we honor the sanctity of marriage? Divorce has become the easy way out.

I was riding with a friend in Georgia, and he was telling me a story about a pastor friend that was going through his second divorce. That scares me even more, because as leaders in Christianity we sacrifice our family lives to make everyone else in our churches and ministries happy. It sometimes leaves us no time to love and cherish our own wives and children. You know the old saying, the preachers children are the worst kids. It’s because he is so busy taking care of everyone else!

I am very active in Men’s Ministry and I see this all the time; men leading other men who have terrible home lives. It is easier to get our validation from other men than to face our wives and their concerns, but this is a terrible trap to fall in to. Paul says in the book of Ephesians, “ Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”The Bible is clear about our roles as men to our families; Christ is even called the bridegroom. The holiness of marriage is extremely important because it is the closest picture of Christ and His church.

So the next time you take time away from a Pastor on a Sunday afternoon, or call him at home because of gossip, remember to truly honor God means to honor the sanctity of marriage (his marriage to) above religion. Spending time teaching (in love) your children is more important than religion. Missing a weekly men’s meeting to take your wife and kids to have ice cream is not a sin, it is an honor.

So how will you honor your own marriage?

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. Jan permalink
    September 15, 2010 8:38 am

    🙂

  2. Ralph McLelland permalink
    September 15, 2010 9:29 am

    One of my best friends was in the office this morning and we talked about relationships. The relationship that we have with others and with God. I even sent a long email response to another good friend of mine this morning about relatioships. In our mind we have to be accepted by man before we feel that Christ can accept us. Now, we know that He will accept us as we are but the message that many churches put out is not that way. We are accepted by Christ just the way we are. He LOVES us. By building a relationship, by being known by others by removing our false face, we learn to be accepted by man which in turn makes it easier for me to understand that Christ will accept me also. It’s all about the relationship. Get alone with God, be still and listen. Thanks Mike.

  3. September 15, 2010 11:41 am

    I think we also need to be accepted by our wives. We have a tendency to leave them behind.

  4. Reggie permalink
    September 15, 2010 2:00 pm

    Rob Bell expounds on this topic in Chapter 6 of Sex God. Here’s a question he asks:

    “What if his love for her was so great that he would give his life for hers in the blink of an eye?”

    • September 15, 2010 3:59 pm

      I need to read it; I love Rob Bell’s NOOMA Videos, but I have never read Sex God. That is how we should feel about our wives.

  5. September 17, 2010 6:41 am

    One of my best friends was in the office this morning and we talked about relationships. The relationship that we have with others and with God. I even sent a long email response to another good friend of mine this morning about relatioships. In our mind we have to be accepted by man before we feel that Christ can accept us. Now, we know that He will accept us as we are but the message that many churches put out is not that way. We are accepted by Christ just the way we are. He LOVES us. By building a relationship, by being known by others by removing our false face, we learn to be accepted by man which in turn makes it easier for me to understand that Christ will accept me also. It’s all about the relationship. Get alone with God, be still and listen. Thanks Mike.
    +1

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